3 From Hell

This certainly wasn’t a film that needed to be made but I’m not mad about it. Word on the street had me believing that it would be abysmal. It wasn’t that bad overall but it is guilty of something far worse… it’s kind of boring. Also, a lot of the content has been done before in Corpses/Rejects so – YAWN.

Somehow it’s worth watching just for the ‘Baby with a bow & arrow, inexplicably wearing an Indian headdress’ montage though.

3 From Hell

Sequel to The Devil’s Rejects. (That’s it. That’s the IMDB synopsis).

Luxury Large Featured Image(10)

The Evil Returns.


“Hello America. Did you miss me?” ~ Otis Firefly

My Review

You’d think that the final film in the Firefly trilogy would go out with a bang – like all bets off horror – but honestly, this is quite the damp squib.

Baby, Otis and Captain Spaulding were badly bashed up at the end of The Devil’s Rejects but, despite taking 20 bullets each, they survived. For a time.

Alas, the Captain (Haig) passes away in prison, leaving Otis (Moseley) and Baby (Moon Zombie) the only surviving family. Otis however, isn’t going out easily and during a chain gang outing with his fellow inmates; his half-brother Winslow (Richard Brake) busts him out of state custody. Unfortunately, my love Danny Trejo is slaughtered in the melee (DT you might remember plays bounty hunter Rondo, who’s hot on the heels of the Firefly family in TDR).

Otis, being the warm-hearted chap that he is, takes his new freedom seriously and enjoys a few killings, finally arriving at the home of Virgil Harper (Jeff Daniel Phillips), the Warden of Baby’s women’s facility. The deal is: Virgil breaks her out and saves himself – and the lives of his colleague and their respective partners. Promises, promises Otis old boy.

Baby meanwhile is having a whale of a time in prison, somehow maintaining her stunning locks and terrorising the prison guards. During an unsuccessful parole hearing, she breaks a guard’s nose. Later the guard – Greta (horror pro Dee Wallace) – sets her up to be murdered by fellow prisoners. Which doesn’t go Greta’s (or the prisoners’) way – at all. I would have loved to have had more prison time with Baby TBH, who has all but lost her flimsy grip on reality and is more unhinged than anyone.

Once busted out, things get decidedly less interesting. The siblings set up camp in a disgusting motel until Baby does something to draw attention to the fugitives, forcing them to flee to Mexico. It’s all fun and games however until Rondo’s vengeful son comes looking for Otis…

What will become of the remaining Fireflys and will they make their new lives count?


My Comments

It’s exciting when Baby’s locked up and then it just doesn’t do much. There’s some lovely gore – Otis does his trademark face skinning in one scene – but it feels tired and even he seems done with it. Baby in comparison makes Otis seem like a slightly off hippy uncle and this is not what I signed up for. New addition Winslow is fine but not exactly memorable and their road trip is 30 minutes too long.

Lots of sex workers and undeserving girlfriends get murdered in the crossfire and that pisses me off. It pissed me off in 2005 but Rob, dude it’s 2019 – can’t we just let them live?

Sheri Moon is excellent as Baby, her look is still incredible and I love her but she isn’t the best actress in this role. In previous outings she’s been a supporting character and I think Baby works best in smaller doses.

And finally I have to tell you, the movie really suffers for the absence of Sid Haig (God rest his soul). Captain Spaulding always brought the light relief and the humour – and there’s not much here to make you crack a smile.

It’s a shame really that this was stretched into a trilogy, TDR really ended it perfectly, while we (horror fans) still had a vested interest in the characters. By this point there’s nobody to root for – except maybe the vertically challenged Sebastian (Pancho Moler) – and it really makes a difference. Plus 3FH is left wide open to continue the saga and I beg Zombie to let this one go now, once and for all.

Film details:

Starring: Sheri Moon Zombie, Bill Moseley, Sid Haig
Director: Rob Zombie
Year: 2019
IMDB Rating: 5.8/10
My Rating: 3/5

What are you watching?

GUEST POST: The Ghosts of Halloweens Past

By Jillian Sandy

Since Halloween present and future are rather up in the air at the moment (#unemployment), I will instead turn to the ghosts of Halloweens past.  And before I get too carried away, let the record state that I do spend an inordinate amount of time walking around cemeteries in October whenever possible.  In case you’re doubting my commitment to the holiday here.

Read on, if you dare, for haunting tales of… Halloweens Past!

When:  2004

Where:  The old neighborhood

Why: The last year I went out for Beggars’ Night, aka trick-or-treating, aka soliciting free candy from strangers.  A time when it was fairly common practice to pass out full-size candy bars in my neighborhood, and most people weren’t so sadistic as to offer raisins or dental floss (the horror, the horror!), these were truly the golden days of trick-or-treating.

Even as teenagers, my BFF and I recognized what a time to be alive this was—and were determined to capitalize on this opportunity.  There are no age limits officially recognized for free candy, after all, and what were we if not boundary pushers living on the edge, finding ways to get what was coming to us from the system?

For reasons I can no longer explain, our costume of choice was the quintessential Frenchman, complete with penciled-on mustaches and baguettes.  And thus we were unleashed upon the neighborhood, demanding recompense for the horror of being alive (and being teenagers).

The night that became our last to earn free candy featured so many judgmental and disapproving neighbors asking if we were in college.  I now believe this was merely a product of petty jealousy when these small-minded folk realized that, all this time, they too could have been taking advantage of the prospect of free candy.  We were walking reminders of how confined they were by societal norms and their own reinforcement of those ideals!  However, at the time, it was a tragedy that kept us indoors for the next year’s holiday (though we still had those strange Scooby Doo TV movies, which feature way more oddly sexy cat werewolves than you might expect).

Whatever.  I’d do it all over again, and the reminder of that sweet, sweet candy full of the shame and disapproval of my neighbors suddenly makes me want to do it this year too.

Look at that face

When:  2015

Where: The Red Room of Cat Pain

Why: My adorable/awful cat Bertha Mason was a kitten experiencing her first Halloween!  A significantly less exciting time of year for her than me, as she learned when she modeled various cat hats.  I also carved her face onto a pumpkin, which she failed to properly appreciate.

I haven’t quite gotten to the point where I would buy this festive set of matching pet/person hats (though I did make us matching paper hats at one point).

The good news is, along with the cat torture, she has been spoiled over the years with many a Halloween-themed catnip toy, and fewer cat hats.  But not zero.

When:  2016

Where:  A “haunted” cave with questionable safety practices

Why: Ah, Ohio.  Never let it be said we lack the Halloween spirit as demonstrated by our assortment of festive entertainment:  haunted houses, penitentiaries (including that one from The Green Mile), corn mazes, and…caves.

One of my more adventurous friends, still wearing a boot on one leg from a fall, decided stumbling around a haunted cave seemed like the best way to spend the evening, and so we did.  With an incredibly steep incline down a muddy path to enter the cave, this turned out not to be our wisest decision ever. We spent a ridiculous amount of time wandering around a mini-maze inside the cave until the employees showed us how to get out, passed through the requisite insane asylum-themed room, and even encountered Satan himself (who tried to guide us through the wrong door—onto you, bud).  Never fear: neither of us fell to our doom, and we returned to more familiar terrain, aka sitting on the couch watching B horror films (including one of my all-time favorites: Nazis at the Center of the Earth) shortly after.

Now that we’ve taken a trip into the scary decisions of Halloweens Past, we examine the terror of… Halloween Present (and Future?)

When:  2019

Where:  ?!?!??!?!

Why: This Halloween is the type of holiday that scares me the most:  one that is up in the air. I’m not sure where I’ll be, and I will most likely be unemployed (still).

The only thing certain is the number of horror films and creepy TV I have lined up to consume like they are the air I breathe.  I’m planning to watch the new Child’s Play, horror comedy Little Monsters, catch up on season 2 of The Terror, not to mention all of the films darling Christa and I will watch together for the most wonderful time of the year on the Blog Collab.

After all, I feel the heartwarming lesson I’ve taken away from the ghosts of Halloweens Past is that I should really stay inside more (and don’t you dare make any references to When a Stranger Calls right now).

What will horror/Halloween month look like to you?

You can read more of my love’s words here.