Game of Thrones

I’m Not Crying…

I love to cry. I find it the most cathartic exercise. I don’t think a day goes that I don’t have a little blub – for any number of reasons. Nostalgia, joy, a stubbed toe – all that and more can threaten my mascara on the daily and I’ve become notorious for wearing my emotion on my sleeve.

Over the last few months it feels like I’ve done nothing but cry while being entertained. It started with Avengers: Endgame, which I saw three times and cried through three times and then, most recently, I’ve been haunted by a BBC drama.

Here are the last things to really tug at my heart strings.

*Minor spoilers if you aren’t up to date*

Avengers: Endgame

Historically, I don’t really like going into films that are clearly out to hit me straight in the feels. Obviously Endgame was always going to be a mixed bag of action, adventure, triumph and human sacrifice – and boy did it manipulate the tear ducts. But even though there were surprises, so much of it wasn’t that surprising – and it was glorious.

On first viewing I sobbed as soon as the film started as I thought about The Fallen, in particular Spiderman. “I don’t feel so good, Mr Stark” has followed me ever since Infinity War, a brutal reminder of the futility of life – and how shit Star Lord is because I blame him for everything (and Chris Pratt even more so).

Watching the remaining Avengers deal with the fallout from Thanos’ original finger click was heart-breaking, reminding us that it’s always the ones left behind who suffer the most. There was a plan though, obviously and I don’t think there was ever any doubt that we’d meet our favourites again – and Natasha, Steve, Tony and pals made sure of it.

I’m not going to dwell on the irreversible sacrifices made – if you know, you know – but my God, they were hard to come to terms with.

Game of Thrones – The End

I found Season 8 bittersweet. There were elements I really enjoyed of the final series but ultimately, the conclusion was messy and a lot of the foreshadowing we’d invested ourselves in for the best part of a decade came to nothing.

Regardless, I still got a lump in my throat when we lost key characters (looking at you, Giant Slayer) and the survivors, key characters we joined at the beginning and said goodbye to at the end. I cried for their collective loss and all the time they’ve been apart. I cried for Hodor, who didn’t even get a thank you for holding the door. I cried for Sansa, who outlived all her abusers.

I cried for all the dire wolves we’ve loved and lost. Ditto the dragons. Most of all I cried for the end of one of the best shows I’ve ever seen, notwithstanding Seasons 7 & 8 .

Years & Years

So I still have the last episode of this amazing show to go but the fourth was the real kicker. I don’t think I’ve ever ugly cried as much as I did watching that. Afterwards, I seriously contemplated calling in sick to work and I still can’t get it out of my head.

The show looks at so many relevant issues and one of those is refugees seeking asylum. It says a lot that we see real life images of the trauma caused to children and families on the news all the time, but it takes a well-loved fictional character in the same position to really drive the reality home.

This show is the nuts and I’ve been recommending it to everybody.

Pass the tissues, would you?

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