Okja (Film) Review

Searching for that one friend in a million

There will be no film review next Monday because my beloved is on holiday and deserves a lovely break.

I have lots of post ideas under my belt though so have no fear about missing out on my fascinating updates, they will be coming in thick and fast. Or they’ll be coming, I suppose I shouldn’t promise the world with no idea if I can deliver.

Anyway, I wanted to review (in the loosest sense of the word) a film that’s just appeared on Netflix, one I’ve been looking forward to since I saw the first trailer. I’ll steer clear of spoilers as much as possible since it is brand new and I want you to watch it.

Without further fucking about.

Okja (2017)

IMDB Synopsis

Meet Mija, a young girl who risks everything to prevent a powerful, multi-national company from kidnapping her best friend – a massive animal named Okja.

*All the feels*

My Review

Before we start I feel like a disclaimer should be applied. Not to patronise anyone but this film near killed me emotionally and I thought it was worth a mention. Sure, I watched it under a blanket with a stuffed Hello Kitty (dressed as Wonder Woman) under one arm and a bar of chocolate under the other – my lower sadness level – but still. Prepare to be traumatised.

It also takes some dark turns that I hadn’t expected (but should of, given the director) so there’s that too. My BFF David said he took one look at the preview and knew he couldn’t do it. Which I respect.

Mija is a young girl living in the mountains in Korea. She lives a simple and lovely life with her grandfather and their giant Superpig, Okja. Oh, you want a little background about Okja, do you? Fine.

Okja isn’t just any old family pet. She belongs to the Mirando Corporation, a huge global giant with a controversial past. New CEO, Lucy Mirando (Tilda Swinton) is determined to change the image of the company with a socially conscious rebrand and the answer is obvious – SUPERPIGS. (Isn’t it always?).

As part of this massive project, Mirando have been breeding pigs (bigger, better GM-super food Superpigs for the consumption of the masses) and have dispatched twenty-six of their best piglets to twenty-six locations across the globe. These little beauties will be reared naturally and lovingly by expert farmers for the next ten years – until the ultimate Superpig can be crowned the winner (and their meat can go on sale to the public).

Don’t be mean to the piggies, Tilda

Our heroines therefore have been inseparable since they were babes in the wood and now they literally are just two BFF babes in the wood, frolicking in streams and napping under fruit trees. Until one day, a decade later, Mirando comes knocking again.

The threat comes in the form of TV zoologist Dr Johnny (Jake Gyllenhaal), the face of The Mirando Corp who has, along with the rest of his team, been keeping close tabs on all the pigs across the world. When he claps eyes on Okja though he’s blown away, declares her the hands-down winner and thus begins Okja’s Big Adventure.

While grandpa is resigned to Okja’s future, Mija is not prepared to let it slide. Girl’s gonna fight for her best friend, innit? So she sets off to Seoul (Okja’s first stop) where she falls in with Paul Dano and the Animal Liberation Front and inadvertently becomes part of a much bigger plan to take on Mirando and reveal the sinister truth behind the piggies.

*Boo hiss* Motherfucker!

Mirando (but of course) are not all they appear to be and public relations take a knocking when the ALF gets involved. Lucy’s place at the top becomes precarious while her team pander to every childlike wobble. With her sister, former CEO Nancy (also Swinton) secretly sniffing around, it doesn’t look like she’ll be ruling for long.

Meanwhile, ALF uncover all manner of horrible goings on behind the public face of the company. When Lucy decides to send Mija to NYC to be reunited with Okja, Dano and friends follow and it becomes a mad dash to save the best damn pig I’ve ever seen in my life.

Can they get there before Okja is lost forever – and will true love out?

Leave Okja ALONE!

My Thoughts

This is an odd little movie that I love a lot. It made me feel everything and some of the scenes are so beautiful I can’t get them out of my head. If this is your sort of thing then you’ll be as invested as I in the relationship between little girl and beast.

Ultimately, all that matters here is the friendship between two living creatures and honestly, all I wanted was a peaceful resolution. Whether than happens is for you to find out.

Meanwhile, most performances are spot on. Swinton nails both Mirando sisters with ease. If you’ve seen 2013’s Snowpiercer then you’ve had a flavour of what you get here.

Other standouts are Seo-Hyuan Ahn as Mija, who’s all kinds of amazing in her pursuit of what’s right. I also had time for the ALF, especially K (Steven Yeun). I was worried this film would be very white washed and perhaps it is but I thought its blend of Eastern and Western culture wasn’t too bad.

There are lots of comments here about the state of the world and our mass consumption. At times I felt it was asking me to consider where my fulfilment comes from and at what cost. It’s hard to watch this film when you’re invested in an animal with a rounded personality that loves and is loved, you know?

Okja gives you food for thought, is beautiful, touching and stressful as heck. I recommend it. And honestly, from the start your only concern will be the pig. 🐷 

Have you seen Okja? If so, what are your thoughts?

Ps. We’ll be reviewing Okja on All Out of Bubblegum in the next few weeks, so watch out for that. 

45 Years (Film) Review

There’s no witty intro for this week’s choice. Perhaps given the sombre subject matter of my chosen flick? Whatever it is, and whatever our thoughts on the film, it definitely throws up some feelings.

I’m going straight in because I feel like Charlotte Rampling‘s character would want that (she’s a former teacher and doesn’t beat around the bush).

45 Years (2015)

IMDB Synopsis

A married couple preparing to celebrate their wedding anniversary receives shattering news that promises to forever change the course of their lives.

The old skool version of reading your partner’s messages

*Spoilers for dayz*

Fucking hell. Imagine for a second that you’ve been married to the same man for 45 years (believe it or not this isn’t a horror movie). Then imagine that, days before your anniversary party, your husband receives a letter telling him that the corpse of his old girlfriend, who fell off a mountain over 50 years previously, has just been recovered. How would you feel?

Well this is the awful situation Kate Mercer (Rampling) finds herself in when her husband Geoff (Tom Courtenay) receives the aforementioned correspondence. Geoff it seems, has given his old lady minimal information about his old flame Katya (which to be fair isn’t unusual). All Kate knows is that the couple had been climbing a mountain and Katya fell off.

The letter, from Switzerland, states that her remains have been found and that, given the icy conditions of the recovery site, have been perfectly preserved. This brings up some feels in Geoff, who is reasonably shaken by this turn of events and ponders the fact she’ll look exactly as she did over half a decade before, while he’s now old aged.

She wasn’t really sure what they were looking at but she played along anyway

Kate herself is a little shaken but to begin with brushes this off as just a thing that’s happened. She assures Geoff that she can’t be mad at something that happened before they even met. As the days pass and their big celebratory bash draws nearer however, it becomes apparent that neither of them are fine.

Kate is (again, understandably) torn between wanting to know everything and not wanting to talk about it, while Geoff retreats inward, beating himself up about forgetting his German and needing a dictionary to help him translate the letter. At night, Kate prompts him to open up and he does, explaining that he and Katya had pretended to be married on their travels. There are anecdotes about their time together and despite Kate fishing for detail, she doesn’t handle it well.

Slowly but surely the couple start to drift apart and things get worse when Kate wakes to find Geoff in the loft. He finds Katya’s photograph and Kate begs to see it. This is not a wise move as having a face to put to the name makes Kate even more insecure.

Unlike Theresa May, Charlotte Rampling was not big on running through fields of wheat

This film perfectly captures the new feeling of distrust. Every quiet moment, every far off gaze is loaded and dangerous, and I can’t pretend the atmosphere conjured up by the performances didn’t get to me. Grief is an unpredictable thing but so is jealousy and the feeling of inadequacy.

Kate can’t help herself either as she unravels all the secrets Geoff is still keeping from her. Transparency it not the one here and it hurts to watch. What’s a person to do when they come to learn they were second choice – or at least believe they were? How do you compete with the spectre of a lost love?

Let me tell you that I don’t know how I would deal in this situation. I can only strongly surmise that I’d handle it worse than Kate does.

So, where can our once happy couple go from here? Will their story end here or is there more to come. Well, who knows dear reader. Who knows?

She always got stranded at the fucking kids table

My Rating

4.5/5. Brilliant but harsh. The performances, particularly Rampling’s, are mesmerising.

What did Jill think of this rather melancholy offering? Would she drop it off a mountain or throw a party with all her friends there to celebrate it? Find out here.

Weekly Digest #1

With the dawn of a new job, I want to start getting into the swing of regularly writing posts that aren’t movie reviews (though obviously that will continue).

I’ve swiped the title for this series from Hannah of Ponderous Pieces because I’m a massive copy cat and couldn’t think of a better one.

Welcome to Week 1. These are the things I’m into this week:

Jeremy Corbyn 

He’s the one, pure and simple. He just talks sense as far as I see it and he’s cool, mucks in, talks to the people and makes his own jam. He’s the hero this country needs and deserves – and for the first time in maybe ever, I have hope in my heart for the future of this country.

#forthemanynotthefew

GLOW

Or Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling. This show is addictive as hell and features Kate Nash. That might be all you need to know but there are also many other great things to note: fab 80’s costuming, beautiful ladies of every shape, size and ethnicity (so far they’re all being stereotyped, I hope this changes) and a central character that we’re actually supposed to hate on. Pass the motherfucking Lycra, yo.

I might write more about this show at a later date.

Lottie London Mermaid Glow

I got mine for £5.95 and it’s super pretty. Especially when you first transfer it to the brush. Glow, baby, glow!

Tesco Metros had really changed their look

Lost River 

Ryan Gosling‘s directorial debut from a few years back and I’ve only just got to it. I really enjoyed it. It has a dystopian feel with a stellar cast (Christina Hendricks, Iain De CaesteckerSaoirse Ronan) and tells the story of an underwater town that has a magical hold on the areas surrounding it (or does it?). It is much better than I’ve made it sound, promise!

New Beginnings

I’m a sucker for new beginnings. Fresh notebooks, clean sheets, new handbags – all those things that are just waiting to be filled (and messed up)! I’ve got one now with my new job and new colleagues, and I’m excited to see what the future holds (plus I’m maybe just a little bit nervous!)

What are you digging this week?

Thanks Hannah for the inspo and see you all next week. 

Southside With You (Film) Review 

I don’t know about you but I sometimes wonder if the world is broken beyond repair. I mean, all the bad that happens, it’s hard to process sometimes. And yet, the human spirit will always surprise you and so will people.

This is leading somewhere, don’t worry. I’m trying to big up the Obamas, like they need my shoddy cheer-leading skills. But they’re cool, right? Good, gracious and genuinely caring people who want to make a difference in the world – and have, too. I fucking miss them both.

This week we’ve taken a break from home invasion to spend 80 minutes with the best ever First Couple, before they became the FC. A heart warming prospect I’m sure.

So let’s put on our best first date outfits and get ready to be wooed. 😍

Southside With You (2016)

IMDB Synopsis

The film chronicles the summer 1989 afternoon when the future President of the United States, Barack Obama, wooed his future First Lady, Michelle Obama, on a first date across Chicago’s South Side.

My Review

In 1989, Barack Obama (here played by Parker Sawyers) was a lowly summer associate at a law firm in Chicago. Michelle Robinson was his supervisor and as we open, FLOTUS (and always will be) is preparing herself for a non-date with the man himself. She is adamant to anyone who mentions it that this is in no way A. Romantic. Date.

The contrast between the two prepping rituals is amusing. Michelle (Tika Sumpter) takes great pains with her appearance, while Obama is chill af. He smokes, reads and takes a call from his mother, while Michelle does her hair and make-up in the bustling apartment she shares with her family. Although these differences could be explained away as a man/woman thing I think it’s telling us far more about the characters themselves.

Michelle is a very serious woman and as the date begins, we learn she is unamused by Obama’s romantic gestures. She is reluctant to become romantically involved with anyone who may reflect badly on all the hard work she has done at the firm, as a woman in a male dominated environment but especially as a woman of colour.

“I said it wasn’t a fucking date, why won’t anyone listen to me… oh, right.”

Obama, unfortunately, annoyed me a little here with his persistence. I get that it’s supposed to be cute and that his perseverance obviously paid off but I am not a fan of it*. There are moments I found him condescending, though Michelle more than bats it back at him. Maybe I’m being picky and peevish, that’s just what I felt.

*That I’m a nice guy, I’ll keep asking ’til she cracks because she doesn’t know how great I am narrative sends a bad message, I think.

Once Michelle realises she’s been tricked into spending time with Obama before a meeting later that afternoon, she isn’t best pleased but slowly starts to come around. First they visit a Ernie Barnes exhibit, where both display impressive understanding and analysis of the work before them. Then they take a walk and Michelle gets involved in the local drum circle. Obama has heart eyes for days because damn is she hot.

In between each activity, the pair ask a lot of questions and get to know each other much better. Michelle learns (and so do we, the viewer) more about Obama’s mother and his time living in both Hawaii and Indonesia. She, meanwhile, is inspired to open up about her own family life.

It’s sweet obviously because these are massive global icons and some could argue the poster children for a happy, healthy power relationship – and this is where it all began.

“Great, so how am I supposed to get down?”

Later at the council meeting (the one she actually agreed to), Obama wows Michelle with his eloquent and moving speech about how to fight the government to get the community centre the locals so desperately need. He speaks with ease and strength, obviously an impressive speech-maker from the get go. The meeting is a screaming success and Bam is the man of the moment.

This sets off some feelings in Mich too, who is doing Trademarking law (I think) as a career but originally wanted to help people. Somewhere between Obama’s speech and the car she’s started to doubt her path. At one point Obama also addresses the fact that he thinks she should be doing more and Michelle does not like it. I don’t like it either tbh but this is Obama and so it comes from a good place. The truth hurts anyway so both Michelle and I need to consider that.

The pair enjoy drinks (where past relationships are discussed) and then a movie (Spike Lee’s Do The Right Thing), where Michelle’s worst fears come to fruition when they bump into her (white, middle-aged male) colleague. He’s pleasant enough but makes a comment that Mich construes as a dig at her doing the help (my words). This results in a heated discussion with Bam in the car.

As the great day date (and the most important first date in American history?) draws to a close, will it take a negative turn – or can Barack Obama, arguably the Greatest Leader of the Free World to date – pull it back? It’s never short of incredible what a chocolate ice cream cone can do. Just sayin’.

My Thoughts

I thought this was sweet but only okay. As outlined above maybe I was feeling particularly pernickity but somehow this didn’t pack the emotional punch I was expecting. Maybe it was the unbearable heat we’re experiencing at the moment, but it couldn’t melt this frozen heart.

I love the Obamas and I truly love their story but something about this day in the life left me unmoved. The performances were fine but most of the interest for me hinged on the characters in the community. I wanted more of them (admittedly a tall order for such a relatively short movie).

Maybe I’m dead inside.

Obama couldn’t wait to see Michelle’s reaction to Ghost Shark

My Rating

2.5/5. *Shrug*.

What did my First Lady think of this little number? Would she proudly shout her approval from the rooftops, or hide the date from her colleagues? Find out here

Hush (Film) Review

Not the best film choice for a scaredy cat tbh. This might have to go down as one of my very worst nightmares: unending darkness and exposed windows, no wifi and a mediocre white man bleating on and on about his own superiority.

But imagine all that, without one of your core senses? It’s nasty stuff so it is but let’s move straight in, shall we?

*Spoilers*

Hush (2016)

IMDB Synopsis

A deaf writer who retreated into the woods to live a solitary life must fight for her life in silence when a masked killer appears at her window.

hush002-820x410

Cat videos on a loop forever

My Review

I had high hopes for this one because the premise seriously messes with my chi. As outlined above, apart from sharks, home invasion is my number one worst fear, in life but particularly within the horror genre. Call it reading too much Robert Harris as an impressionable teen, call it knowing this shit can actually happen but it leaves me feeling icy cold.

Maddie (Kate Siegel) lives a secluded life and I’m mostly jealous of that as the only person she has to deal with is her lovely neighbour, Sarah (Samantha Sloyan). Sounds dreamy despite all the negatives I’ve listed above, obviously. Again, what good can ever come from setting up home in a cabin in the woods?

Anyway, an important detail about Maddie is that she is deaf and mute due to an illness in her past. She communicates just fine via sign language – but this doesn’t stop her family, particularly her younger sister, worrying about her.

It turns out, despite her bravado and insistence that she hasn’t isolated herself, rather she was isolated by what happened to her, Maddie is about to find out what being alone in the face of terror really feels like. I hope she gives it hell…

download

The lovely best friend (aka DOOMED)

But first some bonding with Sarah, who pops over to hang with Maddie while she waits for her boyfriend to come round. Maddie is a novelist and has just lent a copy of her latest book to Sarah so they chat about that, the process of writing and the voice Maddie hears in her head, that sounds like her mother’s. Relax, it’s her writer’s voice and it tells her how to end her stories.

Oooh, I sense some foreshadowing…

I should say here that I really thought that Maddie was in love with Sarah, there was something in the way she gazed at her. When they first meet, I was holding out for a tag team smack down to the death. I now accept I may have been expecting a little too much.

Sadly, Sarah bids Maddie adieu after inviting her over for tea and disappears next door. What feels like mere moments later, shit seriously hits the fan and you know what? Isn’t it just like a man to rock up and do abusive things just because he thinks he can?

An aside: after Sarah has left (forever), Maddie takes a phone call from her sister who tells her she should move back to the city. Maddie, of course poo poos the idea. Then her sister literally says Who’s that behind you? Of course our heroine brushes it off as the cat fucking around but honestly, that would be me done right there and then. 

She also sets the fire alarm to very very loud so she can feel its vibrations in her sleep, yet she can’t pick up the vibrations of her best friend being slammed (very symbolically) against her kitchen door while she’s doing the washing up? Either this girl has nerves of steel or she has never watched a home invasion movie in her life. Which just can’t be possible, right? Everybody’s seen Home Alone at the very least.

Hush-1

The Tory campaign trail was getting more and more aggressive…

The premise to Hush is very simple and it plays out well. Maddie’s world is very quiet and the terror of what happens to her seems all the worse because of that. The film very cleverly puts you in Maddie’s shoes by keeping sound and dialogue to an absolute minimum, thus ramping up the tension.

The Man (John Gallagher Jr.) simply rocks up and tells Maddie he’s going to have fun with her before killing her. There’s a speech but all I heard was white noise. It made me furious because women have to fear this every day of their lives, in some capacity, be it walking home from work, answering the door to an unexpected bell, whatever.

So fuck you, The Man, the character representing MEN here and the threat they pose to us in every aspect of our lives, every minute of every hour of every day. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU.

Reading too much into this, maybe? I don’t think so personally. 🤷‍♀️

As Maddie works her way through all the emotions, from disbelief to anger via paralysing fear, you’re with her. There are moments you’ll want to shout at her for standing around prettily but mostly, she’s a fucking survivor and you’re damn straight she gives The Man hell. She kicks his arse solidly to the death and only one person can make it out, who’s your money on?

There are moments of real tension here and a central character you can believe in. She’s really nice and deserves good things – plus she is genuinely gutted at the loss of her friend (because she loves her, I’m still convinced of it). That said I expected more and I don’t know what it is that’s missing. More of a motive? Oh but I like that The Man does this just because for the reasons outlined above, it allows me to really hate him and root even more for the heroine.

There are a few moments when the inner voice is called back and I think perhaps I’d have liked this to have been explored a little more. The silence works so well but when we suddenly start to hear the writer’s voice, and it sounds like a character we’ve never met, it does feel a little tacked on.

hush-main

Always have your lucky arse-kicking mac at hand

My Rating

3.5/5. I wish men would hush a little bit more. Anyway, I like this, even if I didn’t fall in love with it, the way Maddie loves Sarah.

What did Jillian think? Would she shoot an arrow into its leg or let it go without a word? Find out here

The Sisterhood of Night (Film) Review

We’re having a Free for All this month because Melanie Lynskey Month was so inspired, how do you follow immediately on from that? Plus, we’re lazy, what of it?

To this week’s pick which I will say was rather an interesting one!

*Spoilers*

The Sisterhood of Night (2014)

IMDB Synopsis

When a teenage girl says she’s the victim of a secret network called The Sisterhood of Night, a quiet suburban town becomes the backdrop for a modern-day Salem witch trial.

the_sisterhood_of_night_still

I always wear my tiara to sleepovers too

My Review

Ah teenage girls. Thank fuck I never have to be one again. Though, I wonder, had I been a teen in this movie, would I have made it into the Sisterhood? I’m pretty sure not.

Mary Warren (Georgie Henley) is kind of a big deal (or so she believes) at her high school and enjoys a rivalry with good girl Emily Parris (Kara Hayward from Moonrise Kingdom). Things come to a head on the day Mary steals Emily’s thunder at a drama rehearsal and Emily, in turn, steals Mary’s phone and publishes her private texts online, on her own blog. The blog has ‘rainbow’ in the title, that’s all I remember.

To get her back Mary accuses Emily of being a ‘blog whore’ which I don’t really understand but never mind. Emily embarrasses herself by not knowing how to properly pronounce ‘whore’. (The W is silent, dear).

Shortly afterwards, Mary posts a mysterious (yet attention seeking) Facebook status saying she is taking a vow of silence.  She then deletes all her social media. You ok, hun?

“Your secret: My favourite film is White Chicks, is safe with us.”

She doesn’t disappear altogether though, unfortunately as we soon learn she’s set up something called the Sisterhood and has enlisted her first members, Catherine Huang (Willa Cuthrell) and Lavinia Hall (Olivia DeJonge). The girls hold a meeting during a school dance and Catherine shares a deep dark secret with the others. The vow of silence forbids the girls from ever sharing each other’s secrets or talking about the Sisterhood to anybody outside the Sisterhood.

Word quickly spreads and Mary’s school mates become obsessed with the Sisterhood. This is only exacerbated by the silence surrounding them. And like all good bandwagons, everyone wants in – nobody more than blog whore Emily. Members are personally picked by Mary though, so she’s shit out of luck.

Emily blows her chances by being a Class A dickhead so she has no choice but to use nefarious means to find out what the fuck’s really going on. She gatecrashes a night-time meeting (all Sisterhood meetings are held after dark) and well, after that let’s just say things escalate quickly.

“Oh okey kokey kokey..”

Emily takes to her blog and publishes tales of dirty chants, girls touching themselves and each other – before claiming they cut her hand and touched her too.

This sets off a bizarre chain of events as a couple of other girls come forward with similar stories about the Sisterhood, and the vow of silence doesn’t help clear things up. Especially as Mary doesn’t hate the drama.

I’m not going to go through every side story and detail but know that each of the girls has their own personal struggle to contend with. Lavinia has a mother who’s just started dating, much to her horror; Catherine’s mother is terminally ill and Mary has a secret boyfriend who’s not crazy about the creeping around. As a result the trio are in regular meetings with the school’s guidance councilor, Gordy (Harold & Kumar‘s Kal Penn!) who is adorable and harboring a crush on Lavinia’s mother, Rose (Laura Fraser).

EVERY good teen movie features a version of this scene

The school grapevine leads us, and our central protagonists, into some dark territory as the hysteria rises and gossip spreads like wildfire. Some of the girls want to break the code in order to stop the rumours once and for all but Mary says she’s got it all in hand.

Meanwhile, Emily’s blog is overwhelmed by girls coming forward about their own experiences of sexual abuse and becomes a safe place for them to talk about their feelings as a result. Emily starts to grow as a person and feels bad for having hatched a horrible plan to get Lavinia to admit that the girls are the satanic worshipping witches everyone thinks they are. (Involving some cheerleaders, but of course and a boy Lavinia has the hots for).

Emily calls Lavinia to warn her but does she make it in time? While we’re asking questions: What is the Sisterhood anyway? And what is the truth about that night with Emily in the woods?

Well, that’s it from me. I think this is quite an interesting film and I’m glad I’ve seen it. The comments it makes about how quickly a mystery can write itself if you court it is intriguing, and the film isn’t scared to examine real life issues that young girls actually go through.

It touches upon teenage sexuality in a non-gratuitous way and I find that quite impressive. The girls themselves seem like actual real girls too and I think that went some way to pulling me in and keeping my attention. Ultimately, it ends in a positive way which I wasn’t unhappy about.

Hey, if you’re a fan of high school movies or teen dramas, this might very well be the film for you. You could do a lot worse.

My Rating

3.5/5. Not bad. 

How does my blog wife think about this? Would she enlist it into the Sisterhood or make bitchy comments about it online? Find out here

Wonder Woman (Film) Review

Imagine trying to talk about a film you’ve waited almost 40 years for.

It’s so difficult to convey what this movie means. Not just from a feminist standpoint but to me, the person. More specifically, me the four-year old obsessed with a high kicking female role model, the icon I wanted to be when I grew up.

And now here I sit on the other side, having devoured the movie and I can’t believe it. It feels amazing. It feels important. And I can’t stop bursting into sporadic tears. (Being reminded of what it felt like to be a kid, with all those simple dreams ahead always makes me feel very raw and emotional).

No traditional review here, just some thoughts and I’ll stay exceedingly light on the *spoilers* because I’m not a monster.

Please see this movie, even if you’ve been burned with the DCEU offerings so far. Even if you still can’t get the horrible aftertaste of Jared Leto’s cackling Joker out of your mouth. Hey, even if you’ve not seen a single superhero movie in your life.

wonder-woman-diana-in-the-trenches

Wonder Woman (2017)

IMDB Synopsis

Before she was Wonder Woman she was Diana, princess of the Amazons, trained warrior. When a pilot crashes and tells of conflict in the outside world, she leaves home to fight a war to end all wars, discovering her full powers and true destiny.

My Thoughts

The first fifteen minutes of my viewing experience was sullied by an over zealous cinema goer who wasn’t going to stand for light chatter or non-designated seating arrangements during this showing, even if her mission to get people to zip it was ultimately more distracting. I get it though, I’m a “Shut the fuck up” truther but I had bigger fish to fry on Thursday night and was willing to let it slide.

Once she’d chilled the fuck out, I was able to fully immerse myself in the wonder of Themyscira and the Amazon philosophy, which is represented stunningly. An island with no men? Sign me up.

Wonder-Woman-Trailer-2-Queen-Hippolyta-and-Diana

Bring your daughter to work day was always fun

Of course this couldn’t remain the state of play forever, as the story has to move on somehow. How better to fuck shit up than to introduce the men? Before we get there though, rest assured that the land of warrior women is not only gorgeous to look at but also hench AF.

Queen Hippolyta (Connie Nielson) worries for her only daughter, spinning Diana a yarn about having moulded her out of clay herself, begging Zeus to bring her to life. This explains why Diana (Gal Gadot) is the embodiment of physical perfection. There’s more to this story though which we’ll unravel as we go.

Aunty Antiope (the mighty Robin Wright) is the henchest of them all, training Diana to be better than anyone and challenging her when she doubts her own strength. But I’m not here to break this all down for you so let’s just say that fate has a plan for the unsullied Princess Diana and her future lays off-island.

wonder-woman-diana-prince-header

Prince(ss) of Hats

Which takes Diana and her new friend, the freshly rescued American Spy Steve Trevor (Chris Pine) to London where our hero will learn all there is to know about humanity and the ugly face of war, all whilst motivated by her own mission.

Some of the best bits are Diana getting to grips with the role of women in the world outside the one she knows. Her constant questioning shines a light on the ridiculousness of almost every situation, and certainly gets her noticed.

Anyway, the action does not stay in London for long, as Diana and Trevor journey further into the heart of darkness, in search of war. Diana for her own reason, Steve because it’s his job. They team up with a rag-tag bunch, which includes the amazing Etta Candy, WW’s sidekick in the comics (played by the lovely Lucy Davis).

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Candy girl. you are my world

I loved the chemistry between Etta and Diana but I wanted much more for them. I guess I would have liked to have explored the concept of different kinds of strength, not just the physical in more depth. You can argue that Etta displays her own anyway, I think my desire for a more female interaction is betraying itself.

A bit about the baddies. Without giving too much away, our main villain is Doctor Maru AKA “Doctor Poison” (Elena Anaya), the half-masked scientist with a deadly objective, to build the perfect super weapon. She is backed by German bad boy Ludendorff (Danny Huston) who is chemically altered by the Doc’s own concoctions whenever the need arises.

Like Etta, I would have liked to learn more about Doctor Poison’s motivations and her history. But there’s a chance we may meet again so I can let that one go.

So Diana travels to the front line and is shocked by what she witnesses. Her innate desire to help everyone is admirable but it’s not always possible to save everyone. That doesn’t mean she doesn’t try and there’s a sequence set in No Man’s Land that is madness personified but also incredible.

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It’s a Woman’s world

This is Wonder Woman’s first chance to shine and boy does she knock this one out of the park. Interestingly, she is never referred to as WW within this movie. Perhaps it’s like describing yourself as pretty or funny, you’re not really supposed to say it about yourself but it’s okay for others to?

Anyway, there’s a lot of action, loads of arse-kicking, a little old-fashioned smooching and a massive final showdown (obvs). Along the way the people’s princess learns more than one valuable life lesson and it’s those truth nuggets that propel a gal (Gadot) forward.

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Even Chris Pine couldn’t spoil this

I loved every minute, honestly. It’s so good to see this movie and know how many young girls there are out there completely beside themselves with excitement. The film is rated 12A and this was a conscious decision by the film’s director, Patty Jenkins to ensure the newest generation of fans could get to it.

It’s not a perfect movie (though it’s the best DC I’ve seen since the Christopher Nolan days) but that just doesn’t matter. It’s an important one and one that needs to be seen. I think every person should go to see this film; the female driven, female directed blockbuster.

You should give it your money so we get more, do it for your daughters, your sisters, your friends. Do it so the next generation have more female role models to look up to.

I can’t wait to see it again.

My Rating

5/5. Obviously.

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